Fine wine, salami rosettes, jokes about messy kitchens, and profound truths about the human person — these were all on offer at the Diocesan Married Couples Date Night.
On March 5, at Clover Hill Winery in Breinigsville, diocesan staff greeted more than 50 couples from across the Diocese while winery employees poured glasses of white, red, and rosé. When guests took their seats in the dining area, they enjoyed artfully arranged charcuterie and lively conversation.
Rhady Tulloch, Diocesan Director of Marriage and Family Life and organizer of the event, welcomed the group, and asked people to raise their hands according to how long they had been married. Couples ranged from being a few months post-wedding to more than 45 years together.
Although everyone loved the food, drink, and fellowship, most audience members agreed that the highlight of the evening was speaker Dr. Ray Guarendi, a Catholic clinical psychologist, author, and national radio and television host.
Guarendi, referred to affectionately by guests as “Dr. Ray,” opened with a joke: “When my wife goes to Confession, she starts with ‘Bless me, Father, for Ray has sinned.’”
One guest commented that Dr. Ray’s talk was almost as much comedy show as it was edifying reflection. The raucous laughter filling the room every few seconds proved this assessment.
Amid the humor, Dr. Ray made insightful points about the importance of forgiveness in a Catholic marriage.
“How wrong do you have to think you are before you say you’re sorry?” he asked. “Most people would say ‘at least 50 percent.’ But if you’re a Christian, it shouldn’t depend on the other person. If you wait for the other person, you’re never going to apologize. Even if you’re only wrong seven percent, you have got to apologize for that seven percent.”
Guests Marie and Victor Muncy, parishioners of St. Mary, Hamburg, said Dr. Ray reminded them that “our spouse is the one we love most next to God,” when he posed the question: “Are your best manners reserved for your spouse?”
Dr. Ray also shared playful but earnest words of encouragement to parents who were worried about their children who no longer practice the faith. He reminded them that Jesus Himself did not even persuade everyone to follow Him.
“You think you’re better at this than the God-Man?” he asked in mock incredulity.
Turning serious for a moment, he added, “You pray for them -- that’s what you’re asked to do. But you can’t tether your peace to the decisions of your adult children.”
After the talk, couples shared their impressions.
“Dr. Ray would speak in a fun and engaging way that would make you laugh,” said Adrian Anatalio, who was just married in the fall. “But then when you stopped to think about it, you’d start thinking more deeply about your marriage.”
“Dr. Ray's talk was not only really fun and entertaining, but it also hit home on some of the current anxieties we struggle with as the parents of four teenagers and a young adult,” said Heather Maigur, who came from Quakertown with her husband Greg. “The stories and wisdom Dr. Ray shared have given us renewed peace and trust in God's providence for our family.”
When the event concluded, couples took home a souvenir bottle of wine, leftovers from the buffet, and food for thought to last well beyond the evening.
